Jacob introduced me to the show about a chemistry teacher turned meth cook about a week ago. Of course, I'd heard about it, but I hadn't ever watched it and I didn't want to jump into a random season.
Luckily, AMC has been showing a "catch-up marathon" of every show from episode one leading up to the fifth season that begins July 15. Jacob told me to record them and start watching. I've been watching two or three episodes a day. Last night, we watched four.
I am hooked. Jacob said, "I'm so glad. I was afraid you wouldn't love it as much as I love it!"
No chance of that. In the pilot episode, as soon as Walter White said to his boss at his part-time job at the car wash, "Fuck you and your eyebrows!" I was all in.
Watching Walter become a badass, watching him struggle against the emasculation that happens in his "regular" life is fascinating. Jacob said, "You see what it is, right? He wants credit for what he's doing. He wants everyone to know he is the man."
Yes, my 16-year-old son is more perceptive than your average grown man.
Now, Jacob and I cannot seem to stop shouting out at random moments: "I am not in danger. I am THEDANGER."
We laugh every time Jesse Pinkman adds "yo" or "bitch" to the end of his sentences. We have laughed at dead bodies sliding down stairs, at Jesse climbing in a plastic bucket to see if a dead body would fit in it, and at many other inappropriate things. That's what we do around here.
If you're not already watching Breaking Bad, you should be. You can watch the first three seasons on Netflix. And set your DVR to record the rest on AMC, yo.
2. The Hook of this Song
You probably recognize this from the TV ads for the new Oliver Stone movie Savages. I could care less about Eminem's part. I just want a recording of the hook of this song on repeat. Skip to the 1:41 mark for the hook.
My friend Laurey loaned me the DVDs for the first month of the program. I'm moving into week three now. Jillian Michaels is a "love her or hate her" sort of personality and I love her. I would like her to come to my house and yell at me in person. I like workouts that make me want to fall on the floor clutching my chest. I'm following the diet plan, too, and every morning I wake up craving my new favorite breakfast: eggs with tomatoes, avocado and a slice of Canadian bacon. In 10 weeks, I'll let you know if I've followed the entire program and if my abs look like this:
Spoiler: They probably won't. I like vodka cranberries too much.
4. The Bachelorette
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJXoHTbkXqYt7wPIfCfYzHOF_cdr72xcIiqbFbU2m3pwaA8xy6t0wPMd6hb7OKmh24Mc-oLc5SRh9G7kdRe1L5x0oZnBPIv2ul9W7aZejOSnW9VX5Usm0Ob3ziMpgEnV9UN1kPT0z0wNo/s320/emily-maynard-the-bachelorette-portrait_284x378.jpg)
The show is an amazing example of how some seemingly attractive men become WAY less attractive when they reveal their personalities.
It's also a good look at what certain types of men truly value. All any of these guys ever mentions is how beautiful Emily is. Is there anything else about her that matters? Apparently not.
I've picked out my favorites (Arie, who has superior make-out skills, and Sean). Yes, I know this is all bull shit, but who cares? It's a good summertime distraction.
Here's a picture of Sean:
5. Apparently...Abs
Eight days until Magic Mike opens in a theater near you.
Related links:
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